Dessa
wanna meet my outlaw-- she ain't very nice. but here she is. Keep in mind this is a very shortened version. the original was lost some time ago and i am recunstructing this from memory. I have also only had a small amount of time actually re-writing. there will be more detail to follow. please-- give advice and such.
Dessa– main character. Was irritatingly good. Is now a criminal mafia leader type. Sorta organizes the un-organizable riff raff into her little "empire" becomes incredibly powerful and wealthy. Chooses to go back to prison in her 40s cause she’s sick of free life.
Dega– riddick like character. Big, attractive, deadly. Relationship to Dessa– they escaped the Kreian together. They are lovers/haters/allies/enemies/everything you could imagine two people could be to each other
Joshua Oboke– a man (almost too attractive) that has connections (blood) with the royal family and is a member of the military. He is actually a competent officer. She meets him at a fancy "family" shindig while she is on a job. He takes to her and they go and shag in a side room. While arranging themselves after she stuns him (knocks out) and leaves him to finish her job. They meet again many times there after, and she knocks him on his ass almost everytime. May or may not be the man who arrests her in the end.
Shaz– Dessa’s right hand. She is always drunk yet has a stunningly accurate shot. Anything that can be fired is her bitch and opponents are smoke. "Runs" the bar. Shows Dessa how to survive and thrive on Cloaca.
Grizzer– the old man on the kreian that takes Dessa in and teaches her to survive the dark side of humanity. He is her mentor and friend. When she escapes he chooses to stay behind. He chose to go there in the first place and wants to stay. It is his "home" and he is a type of king there.
Cloaca– the "dead" planet where the criminals rule due to it being outside official rrf territory. There are zones of the city which determine where folks can trespass. The city with the landing ports is common territory. Everyone can work, live, visit there. The outlying areas are filled with those who make cloaca their home. Most are there because they cannot live in rrf territory. They fiercely defend their homes from the people who just run through the port. Port folks use liaisons to do business with those in locals-only. It is paradoxically safer in locals-only than in port city simply because everyone is aware of how dangerous everyone else in the city is and they adopt a policy of live and let. Trespassers are another story and may be dispatched with in any number of ways including the most common, rats/street rats= the children of locals-only.
Apple/british– no one knows where he’s from, doesn’t really matter. He is called apple because his face is very round and he always looks like he’s just eaten a sour one. British because he has a crappy and badly effected english accent. He is not too smart and is used primarily as a liaison between port and locals-only. Is dessa’s bitch because she chose not to kill him when he tried to attack her just after she’d arrived on Cloaca and entered locals-only.
Solomon– aka God. This man is the go to guy on cloaca for information. Has many addictions, most of them expensive. Despite this is very high functioning and smart. He is known for being wily and cunning.
Dessa was a goody-two shoes type. She was a girl from a moderately successful family and went into the military as soon as she was legally allowed.
She was picked by one of those ultra-secret groups to be their guinea pig. They wanted her to infiltrate the criminal rings operating on the citadel where she was stationed. In order to control her they implanted a biotechnical device theat grows to fit. It is located at the base of the brain and controls all functions and feelings. She is caught and abandoned by the group.
She is transported to a planetary prison, known as a kreian, where she meets Grizzer and Dega.
With Dega and a few others they recycle a bunch of terraforming equipment and turn it into a barely functional ship. When they launch off the planet they immediately issue a distress call.
They take over the ship that answers and kill all the occupants. They then redirect immediately to Cloaca and out of the RRFs territory.
All members split up and go their own ways. Some decide to go back into rrf territory. Others stay on the planet. She is one.
She goes to a bar Grizzer told her about and claims it. It is a true hole in the wall in the locals only part of Cloaca. Locals-only is a completely separate entity on the planet. It is considered a separate city despite the fact that it surrounds and completely engulfs the central port city.
There she meets shaz. The two hit it off as best as two people here can. Shaz essentially moves under the bar (literally) and dessa takes her room. Slowly shaz reveals how the bar makes money and where all the secret spots are– like the massive apt right above the bar which can only be accessed via another secret area behind it.
Dessa networks and engages in both direct and indirect criminal activities all the while taking over other, less well controlled networks, and criminal activities on the planet. Eventually she dominates the whole place and even controls a lot of activity off planet and in rrf territory. All of it is loosely organized and shaz is propped up as the "head." At some point Shaz is killed because of this. She even inveigles her way into rrf and civilian politics via favors she has handed out and performed for them.
At some point for some reason she decides to "retire." She turns herself into the authorities without fight on the promise that she will be returned to the Kreian to live out her life, and not be harmed in any way or kept for a significant length of time in any other holding facility.
There are many well-meant but needless attempts to "rescue" her by her allies and loyal followers. She rejects them all. She is returned to the Kreian where she finds Grizzer almost dead. They enjoy a brief reconciliation before he dies and passes the planets "throne" off to her.
The End.
Dessa– main character. Was irritatingly good. Is now a criminal mafia leader type. Sorta organizes the un-organizable riff raff into her little "empire" becomes incredibly powerful and wealthy. Chooses to go back to prison in her 40s cause she’s sick of free life.
Dega– riddick like character. Big, attractive, deadly. Relationship to Dessa– they escaped the Kreian together. They are lovers/haters/allies/enemies/everything you could imagine two people could be to each other
Joshua Oboke– a man (almost too attractive) that has connections (blood) with the royal family and is a member of the military. He is actually a competent officer. She meets him at a fancy "family" shindig while she is on a job. He takes to her and they go and shag in a side room. While arranging themselves after she stuns him (knocks out) and leaves him to finish her job. They meet again many times there after, and she knocks him on his ass almost everytime. May or may not be the man who arrests her in the end.
Shaz– Dessa’s right hand. She is always drunk yet has a stunningly accurate shot. Anything that can be fired is her bitch and opponents are smoke. "Runs" the bar. Shows Dessa how to survive and thrive on Cloaca.
Grizzer– the old man on the kreian that takes Dessa in and teaches her to survive the dark side of humanity. He is her mentor and friend. When she escapes he chooses to stay behind. He chose to go there in the first place and wants to stay. It is his "home" and he is a type of king there.
Cloaca– the "dead" planet where the criminals rule due to it being outside official rrf territory. There are zones of the city which determine where folks can trespass. The city with the landing ports is common territory. Everyone can work, live, visit there. The outlying areas are filled with those who make cloaca their home. Most are there because they cannot live in rrf territory. They fiercely defend their homes from the people who just run through the port. Port folks use liaisons to do business with those in locals-only. It is paradoxically safer in locals-only than in port city simply because everyone is aware of how dangerous everyone else in the city is and they adopt a policy of live and let. Trespassers are another story and may be dispatched with in any number of ways including the most common, rats/street rats= the children of locals-only.
Apple/british– no one knows where he’s from, doesn’t really matter. He is called apple because his face is very round and he always looks like he’s just eaten a sour one. British because he has a crappy and badly effected english accent. He is not too smart and is used primarily as a liaison between port and locals-only. Is dessa’s bitch because she chose not to kill him when he tried to attack her just after she’d arrived on Cloaca and entered locals-only.
Solomon– aka God. This man is the go to guy on cloaca for information. Has many addictions, most of them expensive. Despite this is very high functioning and smart. He is known for being wily and cunning.
Dessa was a goody-two shoes type. She was a girl from a moderately successful family and went into the military as soon as she was legally allowed.
She was picked by one of those ultra-secret groups to be their guinea pig. They wanted her to infiltrate the criminal rings operating on the citadel where she was stationed. In order to control her they implanted a biotechnical device theat grows to fit. It is located at the base of the brain and controls all functions and feelings. She is caught and abandoned by the group.
She is transported to a planetary prison, known as a kreian, where she meets Grizzer and Dega.
With Dega and a few others they recycle a bunch of terraforming equipment and turn it into a barely functional ship. When they launch off the planet they immediately issue a distress call.
They take over the ship that answers and kill all the occupants. They then redirect immediately to Cloaca and out of the RRFs territory.
All members split up and go their own ways. Some decide to go back into rrf territory. Others stay on the planet. She is one.
She goes to a bar Grizzer told her about and claims it. It is a true hole in the wall in the locals only part of Cloaca. Locals-only is a completely separate entity on the planet. It is considered a separate city despite the fact that it surrounds and completely engulfs the central port city.
There she meets shaz. The two hit it off as best as two people here can. Shaz essentially moves under the bar (literally) and dessa takes her room. Slowly shaz reveals how the bar makes money and where all the secret spots are– like the massive apt right above the bar which can only be accessed via another secret area behind it.
Dessa networks and engages in both direct and indirect criminal activities all the while taking over other, less well controlled networks, and criminal activities on the planet. Eventually she dominates the whole place and even controls a lot of activity off planet and in rrf territory. All of it is loosely organized and shaz is propped up as the "head." At some point Shaz is killed because of this. She even inveigles her way into rrf and civilian politics via favors she has handed out and performed for them.
At some point for some reason she decides to "retire." She turns herself into the authorities without fight on the promise that she will be returned to the Kreian to live out her life, and not be harmed in any way or kept for a significant length of time in any other holding facility.
There are many well-meant but needless attempts to "rescue" her by her allies and loyal followers. She rejects them all. She is returned to the Kreian where she finds Grizzer almost dead. They enjoy a brief reconciliation before he dies and passes the planets "throne" off to her.
The End.
1 Comments:
Feels like a combination of Firefly, Star Wars, and LoTR.
Firefly because of the characters and their interactions (guinea pig girl; aka River).
Star Wars because of the planet. The planet sounds like (prepare your self for major geek-talk) the pirate world Nar Shadda, moon of Nal Hutta. Nal Hutta is the home planet of the Hutts, including Jabba who later moved to Tatooine. Nar Shadda naturaly became an outlaw safehouse in which only the brave tread (speak softly and carry a big blaster). Han Solo had a bad run-in with a bounty hunter once on Nar Shadda (of course Jabba's bounty is still on his head even though Jabba is dead, go figure).
Lastly LoTR because of Solomon the god.
In short, I like it!
Post a Comment
<< Home